I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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