She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
