if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
You're a waste of cheezeits
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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