Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Randomize
