I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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