ya dads aren't the best wingmen
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
