She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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