I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
