Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
