I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Randomize