so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize