Sponge bath it is.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
