The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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