Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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