WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
