Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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