There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I looked at my own cervix.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
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do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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