So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
