Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize