Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
