There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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