she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
