Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

Have you learned any life lessons?

(406): View more from Montana

I like big butts and I cannot lie.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.

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(518): View more from New York

Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face

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(630): View more from Illinois

If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(804): View more from Virginia

it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate

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(703): View more from Virginia

Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.

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(316): View more from Kansas

Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?

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