the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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