Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.

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  (515): He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar. http://tfl.nu/v158
  Replies (54) Good night (2806) Bad night (1071)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!

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  (904): So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius! http://tfl.nu/2kph
  Replies (259) Good night (5043) Bad night (4891)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.

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  (407): my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed. http://tfl.nu/xljx
  Replies (87) Good night (3569) Bad night (31548)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.

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  (614): trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room. http://tfl.nu/9qb1
  Replies (17) Good night (1066) Bad night (5953)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!

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  (903): How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?! http://tfl.nu/tpho
  Replies (19) Good night (1160) Bad night (2368)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.

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  (816): no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help. http://tfl.nu/7acp
  Replies (7) Good night (2375) Bad night (812)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

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  (201): MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. http://tfl.nu/cgk3
  Replies (8) Good night (3326) Bad night (528)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?

  (1-701): View more from North Dakota

  No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"

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  (701): Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..? (1-701): No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup" http://tfl.nu/9q23
  Replies (1) Good night (1670) Bad night (835)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship

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  (214): I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship http://tfl.nu/dbjp
  Replies (3) Good night (1177) Bad night (538)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night

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  (613): Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night http://tfl.nu/lkdl
  Replies (4) Good night (1519) Bad night (460)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  Marco

  (954): View more from Florida

  Polo

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  (954): These days, you and me are swimming in dicks. (1-954): Marco (954): Polo http://tfl.nu/zk92
  Replies (6) Good night (2550) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.

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  (912): Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks. http://tfl.nu/l0wp
  Replies (5) Good night (1135) Bad night (451)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.

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  (314): Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous. http://tfl.nu/8pll
  Replies (15) Good night (1355) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  There's a naked man in my car right now.

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  (903): There's a naked man in my car right now. http://tfl.nu/6qzb
  Replies (6) Good night (642) Bad night (280)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I go down on you because abs

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  (778): Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you. (604): I go down on you because abs http://tfl.nu/mkq3
  Replies (1) Good night (885) Bad night (212)

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