Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though