Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
