no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
