Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
