I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
