if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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