Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Randomize
