just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
