All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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