so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize