still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
