he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
We are two peas in an std pod
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Randomize
