It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
