He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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