names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize