1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize
