i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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