i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
