Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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