Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
