We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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