Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
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Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
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