Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
