Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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