dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
