i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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