my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
